Tuesday, February 26, 2013

She's a Little Scary

She is deciding if you would taste better with ketchup or ranch.
My kid Sparky? She is a gem. This kid is the kindest, sweetest, funniest kid around. She has a razor sharp wit that can snap at you like a whip when she wants, nail you good, and then you are not surprised when the next thing out of her mouth is, "Would you like some aloe? Because I think you just got burned." She is, by the way, only 10.

Somehow, the Donner party tragedy came up in conversation recently. Okay...in the interest of full disclosure I have to admit I started it. I made a crass and tasteless joke (because that's how I roll) about throwing a Donner...er...dinner party, and my curious little Sparky wanted to know who they were and why I would make cannibal jokes about them. I explained about the pioneers trudging out west with their wagons and carts, hoping to beat the winter as they made their way to California but instead getting stuck in the mountains for months, and surviving...well, as cannibals often do when they must choose between life and starving to death. She is a sensitive child and has been bullied by mean girls on whom I wanted to go all momma bear, so I thought the idea of eating people to survive would upset her sensibilities. Instead, I was blown away by her response.

"If I got stuck like that, I know who I'd eat first," she said, and then named the bully.

I didn't know whether to laugh or not, but I did know one thing for sure: I want to make sure I stay on this girl's good side.